M'sia with buds last night.
Jacuzzi, Sauna & Massage @ New York Hotel.

Followed by our addictive RM$70 loklok.
I thought- Must bring darling here to try. He'll love it. - Then, i remembered, no chance :'(

Then visited Hola for awhile. It seems like a nice place with live band, powerful female voices.
They played R&B and Trance first. That was when i heard so many of "your songs". Immediately, i thought - if darling was here, he'd be happily dancing & all. Then again, same thing happened. - The word "IF", which will never happen.

Home'd at 3am.



Today, KO'd till 3pm.
Woke up feeling sick, skipped work the a day.

Infection in left eye. Too much tears, i guess.


If no, why'd people tell me such things? Why'd people even think that you were actually jio-ing her if you're not? LOL isit FLIRTING? (which was what you always did) No use denying. Just say yes if you thought of jio-ing, even once. Maybe i'd feel better. It's better seeing you happy with someone else than suffer and be with me.
I used to believe what people told me. You taught me to believe what i see. Now, that i don't even believe what i see & hear, I believed you. Yet, i was let down time and again. Z's incident, i told myself to believe you instead of what i saw with my own eyes. PH incident taught me the same too. But, it was a lesson learnt for blind trust. Now, with this new one, idk what to do.
Idk what's got into me. I was never like this after breakup. The longest i took was 3weeks + w/o tears. It's fucking torturing.